The Point Man and The Porn
by Lazarus76
Summary: A new assignment...and Arthur is disgusted by the client. One shot. Crack.


**Disclaimer**:** Inception does not belong to me. Couldn't resist a follow up. I know I've done cross overs where Arthur has met Blake, and also Adam...but Arthur meeting Jon Martello?** It** might go something like this...**

Arthur swallowed as the cab drew up in front of an apartment block. Dressed in a three piece suit, he blinked as he surveyed the young men standing outside. They were clad very casually - jeans, muscle shirts, and sneakers. And all, Arthur noticed, had an especially bulked up, muscular look.

He shook his head. He'd agreed to meet Jon Martello, on the strength of the last email. He'd sounded genuinely relieved that they were willing to help him, although Arthur had carefully concealed his actual intention. Sighing, he got out, and paid the fare, then proceeded to walk to the apartment's main door.

He pressed the buzzer. After a short while, A voice slurred through the device.

"Yeah?"

"Hello, Mr Martello?" Arthur spoke calmly, and clearly. "Its Arthur Ogilvie, I-"

Suddenly, the door buzzed open. Clutching the PASIV, Arthur began to enter, and climbed the steps to the address given. He knocked on the door.

After a second, the door opened. Arthur blinked. Standing in front of him was a bulky, muscular young man, whose blue vest shirt and low slung jeans were too young for him. Arthur swallowed, wrinkling his nose slightly. He held out a hand.

"Mr Martello?"

"Hey man, how you doin'?" Arthur blinked. The slightly leering tone of voice gave him a good indication to the type of man he was dealing with. He shouldered his flight case, and stepped inside.

"Beer?"

"No, thank you." Arthur checked his watch. It was 11am.

"Aw, c'mon, man. Have a beer." A can flew towards him - Arthur grabbed it. He watched as Jon strode from the small kitchen area to the lounge. Arthur followed him, noting the clean stylishness of the apartment.

"Have a seat."

Arthur sat down. He reluctantly pulled open the tab on the can. Jon sprawled opposite him, and looked slightly expectant.

"Well," Arthur began, putting down the beer on the coffee table. "You want me to do an extraction on your girlfriend?"

"Yeah." Jon looked slightly embarrassed. "See, she's a dime-"

"A what?" Arthur interrupted.

"A dime, man, a perfect ten. She's hot."

Arthur nodded. "If you say so." He frowned.

"No, I mean it! Here!"

Arthur blinked as a photograph was shoved in front of him. It showed a gorgeous young woman, blonde and voluptuous, smiling for the camera. Arthur nodded. "She's lovely."

"Yeah, and I though we were ok." Jon sat down. "But, she found out about my porn...and now she doesn't want to see me again."

"Your porn?" Arthur was beginning to wonder if this was a joke, and the guy was really a friend of Eames'. "What do you mean?"

"Porn, man. Net porn. I love it. I can go to clubs, I love my women, but porn...I just love to watch it." He pointed in the direction of the sleek silver laptop. Arthur raised an eyebrow. "The things they do...you then meet a woman, and-"

Arthur blinked. "So, your girlfriend found out you were watching net porn..." he said, slowly.

Jon nodded. "Yeah."

"And she was offended..."

"Yeah..."

"But you want me to extract the fact she's offended from her."

"That's right, man."

"Mr Martello-" Arthur looked at him. "Has it occurred to you that just giving up your porn might be easier? Or just being a nice guy?"

"Girls lie when they say they want a nice guy." Jon looked offended. "I mean, come on man." He stretched out. Arthur blinked - the man's rippling chest indicated that all he did was spend time in the gym, and bars. "She's the most beautiful thing I ever saw. She wants me, I know it."

Arthur rubbed his face. This guy was worse than the Fischer job. How could someone so unutterably dense be able to stand upright, walk and talk...all at the same time?

"All right." Arthur smiled. "Give me her number."

Jon smiled, one of relief. "Thanks, man. We gotta stick together, you know? Not let them take our porn!"

Arthur smiled thinly as he was was handed a piece of paper. "Yes, that's right."

* * *

Arthur sighed. Jon was hooked up to the PASIV. "What is that shit?" he'd asked, worriedly.

"Nothing to worry about. Listen. I'm going to go into a dream with you and her, and when you wake up, she won't remember anything about your porn."

Jon closed his eyes. Arthur hit the central button. Suddenly, the door bell rang, and he answered it.

A beautiful woman stood in front of him. Blonde, curvy, she was wearing a soft, clinging black dress, and clutching a bag. She blinked.

"Well, good evening." Arthur smiled. "Barbara?"

"Yes?" she said, uncertainly.

"Jon's in here."

She followed him into the lounge, her eyes widening as she saw Jon, hooked up to the PASIV. She looked questioningly at Arthur.

"Oh, I told Jon that I was going to make you forget his porn."

Her face darkened. "I don't believe this! He is such a-"

"Ms Sugarman," Arthur said calmly. "The best way to forget his porn...and him...is to go out for dinner with me."

Barbara blinked, and looked at Arthur, then her face broke into a radiant smile. "You're so nice."

"Jon reckons girls don't want a nice guy."

"Oh, he's lying." She tossed back her blonde hair. "Now, shall we go?!"

**End. **

**Reviews are always welcome and appreciated, thank you!**


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